You and the weekly WW meetings have become my accountability partners in the Chubby Bride Workout Plan.
Results: lost 4 tenths of a pound....
good news: I lost and didn't gain.
bad news: this could be a really long journey to a 20 lb. loss at 4 tenths of a pound each week.
So I went home and had a low count dinner - 2 chicken legs and green beans and whole wheat bread. Then I took one bite of several different things Donna brought back from Texas. She has absolutely the best smorgasborg of food in her pantry. She always buys different and interesting things like Bluebonnet jelly, cocoa roasted almonds, things from the bakery,...she buys things I would never buy because of the calories. I am kind of plain jane when it comes to buying food because I know I will just eat it.
Weight watchers tells you to write it if you bite it. Well, I bit it and I am just going to write it off as a hungry girl moment and let it go.
My goal for this week starting today is to:
Write it if I bite it. Everything.
Have a perfect 19 point a day week
Add cardio to my already intensive workout.
Try to have a 3 lb loss (well really I need a 4 lb one to stay on goal but I don't know if I can do it.)
Measure my body.
85 days to the wedding day.
The Chubby Bride.
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Chubby Bride Work-out Plan
Scott and I - okay - Jaye decided she wanted to get married in October in an aspen grove during the beautiful, fall color. hmmmm....December to October (2nd) - that gave me a good eight months to get ready. Ready as in looking good in a wedding dress. And it will take every bit of eight months.
How is it you can look at yourself in the mirror day after day and not see yourself? Like, see yourself as, "I am FAT!" My FAT revelation did not come with my clothes fitting tighter or clothes not fitting at all, or having to buy bigger jeans and tops; it came with looking at some pictures of myself back in the fall and at Christmas. There it was- this - this - this belly roll over the jeans - not a muffin top - a mushy cake roll hanging right over the top of those jeans! How did THAT get there? I have NEVER had a belly roll....and it didn't go away when I stood up either....holy moly...and then I measured myself.....Holy Shamoly! where did THOSE numbers come from???? Say it isn't SO! Something must be done....
Then I got engaged! And I refuse to be a chubby bride! So I began my Chubby Bride Workout plan and signed on with Weight Watchers in January. Only on-line. I was sure my determination would overshadow any need to go to weekly meetings...with weekly weigh-ins.
Scales scare me. Really they do. And now when I weigh and see numbers I have never seen before - I am terrified. But weighing in is pretty much of a part of the weight watcher plan, so weigh I must - so I weighed on my scales and got one number. Then I weighed at my daughter's and got another number; and then finally on a doctor's scales...that is when I fainted.
Weight Watcher's on-line with the e-tools worked for about two weeks. I loved getting up early in the morning and logging in and filling in the blanks for what I was going to eat that day. I even lost about 6 pounds - just enough for me to think I could slack off and I quit tracking my food. I worked out pretty regularly but had some haphazard weeks. On top of that, the weigh-in was not working. I didn't have a scale at home (I moved and threw the scales away - they were about 5 pounds heavy......yes, I could have bought a new one, but I don't think the accountability for weighing would be there) and going to church to weigh wasn't working either so two weeks ago I joined Weight Watchers "land side" where I go to weekly meetings and weekly weigh ins.
My workout plan has become very focused and rigid. I exercise everyday unless I absolutely cannot - like Sunday - driving home from Denver all day.
And Scott and I decided (yes, both of us) to get married in Belize instead of the aspens. What have I gone and done now? Upped the anty - not only do I have to get in shape for a wedding dress - but now I have added the beach to the picture!
So - so far here are the results:
April 28th - lost 2 lbs.
I have purchased the Physique 57 workout (Kelly Ripa swears by it) and am working out to it 3 days a week and then doing other DVD workouts on the other days. sometimes I walk during the day if I can.
I will measure and tell you how many inches I have lost since Christmas. Even if the scales don't show it, I know I am losing inches because it is getting fun to try on clothes in my closet....Or pull pants out of the dryer, put them on, and they not only fit, but the pocket lining is no longer bulging out the sides.
Today is weigh-in. At 5:00. Why can't there be a 5 AM weigh in where you haven't eaten anything since the night before and you could remove all clothing behind a curtain and step on the scale..... My blood pressure is already rising in anticipation of the results -good or bad.
I have worked out really, really hard this week, and I have had the bare minimum to eat today in anticipation of my meeting with the scales this afternoon. I stuck to the plan except for Saturday night when we had early birthday cake for Scott at the Cheesecake Factory - I did have Low Carb if that helps - and I did walk all day in Denver Saturday. ...5:00 is coming....
Ok, results to be posted tomorrow.
PS.....Wedding date is July 30th...and there is a story behind that too....
The Chubby Bride
How is it you can look at yourself in the mirror day after day and not see yourself? Like, see yourself as, "I am FAT!" My FAT revelation did not come with my clothes fitting tighter or clothes not fitting at all, or having to buy bigger jeans and tops; it came with looking at some pictures of myself back in the fall and at Christmas. There it was- this - this - this belly roll over the jeans - not a muffin top - a mushy cake roll hanging right over the top of those jeans! How did THAT get there? I have NEVER had a belly roll....and it didn't go away when I stood up either....holy moly...and then I measured myself.....Holy Shamoly! where did THOSE numbers come from???? Say it isn't SO! Something must be done....
Then I got engaged! And I refuse to be a chubby bride! So I began my Chubby Bride Workout plan and signed on with Weight Watchers in January. Only on-line. I was sure my determination would overshadow any need to go to weekly meetings...with weekly weigh-ins.
Scales scare me. Really they do. And now when I weigh and see numbers I have never seen before - I am terrified. But weighing in is pretty much of a part of the weight watcher plan, so weigh I must - so I weighed on my scales and got one number. Then I weighed at my daughter's and got another number; and then finally on a doctor's scales...that is when I fainted.
Weight Watcher's on-line with the e-tools worked for about two weeks. I loved getting up early in the morning and logging in and filling in the blanks for what I was going to eat that day. I even lost about 6 pounds - just enough for me to think I could slack off and I quit tracking my food. I worked out pretty regularly but had some haphazard weeks. On top of that, the weigh-in was not working. I didn't have a scale at home (I moved and threw the scales away - they were about 5 pounds heavy......yes, I could have bought a new one, but I don't think the accountability for weighing would be there) and going to church to weigh wasn't working either so two weeks ago I joined Weight Watchers "land side" where I go to weekly meetings and weekly weigh ins.
My workout plan has become very focused and rigid. I exercise everyday unless I absolutely cannot - like Sunday - driving home from Denver all day.
And Scott and I decided (yes, both of us) to get married in Belize instead of the aspens. What have I gone and done now? Upped the anty - not only do I have to get in shape for a wedding dress - but now I have added the beach to the picture!
So - so far here are the results:
April 28th - lost 2 lbs.
I have purchased the Physique 57 workout (Kelly Ripa swears by it) and am working out to it 3 days a week and then doing other DVD workouts on the other days. sometimes I walk during the day if I can.
I will measure and tell you how many inches I have lost since Christmas. Even if the scales don't show it, I know I am losing inches because it is getting fun to try on clothes in my closet....Or pull pants out of the dryer, put them on, and they not only fit, but the pocket lining is no longer bulging out the sides.
Today is weigh-in. At 5:00. Why can't there be a 5 AM weigh in where you haven't eaten anything since the night before and you could remove all clothing behind a curtain and step on the scale..... My blood pressure is already rising in anticipation of the results -good or bad.
I have worked out really, really hard this week, and I have had the bare minimum to eat today in anticipation of my meeting with the scales this afternoon. I stuck to the plan except for Saturday night when we had early birthday cake for Scott at the Cheesecake Factory - I did have Low Carb if that helps - and I did walk all day in Denver Saturday. ...5:00 is coming....
Ok, results to be posted tomorrow.
PS.....Wedding date is July 30th...and there is a story behind that too....
The Chubby Bride
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
Delighting Myself in the Lord!
I said I would follow this theme until the end of May, but I think I can close the theme out now. Delighting myself in the Lord...what an adventure - although sometimes it has been kind of ho-hum, you know - the everyday stuff- but then! there were the really BIG days... like Christmas night! So what HAVE I learned from this adventure?
The first thing would be - "don't sweat the small stuff." Learning to just go with the flow and not spazzing out when things don't go the way you plan. The scripture "Do not be anxious for anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, present your requests to the Lord. And the peace of God which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Phil. 4:6-7
Not having a 'steady' job is a great way to put this verse into practice. As I write the word "steady", I have to smile to myself and ask myself to define steady. I have had the most steady, full-time, part-time job ever by substitute teaching. Seriously! I have consistently averaged 3-4 subbing jobs per week - well not counting post-Christmas! A little 'skinny' there but you know what? It all worked out. For the times when it was a little 'skinny', I reminded myself that God knew my needs, and had exactly the right amount of jobs, on the right days for me. And He did.
Learning to appreciate a flexible job schedule. I have learned to love my schedule. Sometimes I work all day, sometimes half-days, and then sometimes have days off in the middle of the week or the end of the week...long weekends...oh! and I have shorter work days! Out of school at 3:30 or 1:30 on Fridays....plus the schedule has been a god-send for working on my masters degree. which brings me to my next point...
Learning when to let go and having the courage to do it. I am postponing the master's program for a while. The bachelor's program with University of Phoenix was a great experience; however, the master's program has been nothing but stressful with the learning teams from the get-go. During spring break, after a particularly frustating experience, I cried "uncle" and withdraw from the program - mainly because
I was not having the time to plan for my upcoming wedding, much less get excited about it. What a relief to let school go for a time and concentrate on what needs to be priority. With our school's budget cuts, I am not too hopeful that a job will be available any time soon, so why continue the "killer" push to get done? Aside from the fact that that is my personality!
Another thing I let go of was my condo. I have tried selling and renting with no luck selling and worse luck with some of my renters! Ugh! Anyway, after struggling to hang onto the barbie townhouse, I decided to cry "uncle" on that one too and handed it back to the bank. Although I felt a bit of shame not fulfilling my mortgage agreement, I also felt a tremendous sense of relief. A huge burden was lifted from my shoulders and the release of a stress I did not realize I was carrying.
Everyday I continue to feel myself decompressing. I have been on overload for a long time and did not realize the daily pressure I have put myself under. I think a layer lifts each day as my schedule is freer and responsibilities are lighter.
As I close this phase of Delighting Myself, I know I will continue to use the things I have learned and subconsciously, if not consciously, continue to delight myself in the Lord.
Once again, God has been so very good to me as I struggled to find my way. I am grateful for the time I have had for this venture and all of the lessons the Lord has had for me.
I challenge you to have your own "Delight Yourself In the Lord" project. Who knows what God has in store for you!
Coming next: The Chubby Bride Work out Plan!
The first thing would be - "don't sweat the small stuff." Learning to just go with the flow and not spazzing out when things don't go the way you plan. The scripture "Do not be anxious for anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, present your requests to the Lord. And the peace of God which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." Phil. 4:6-7
Not having a 'steady' job is a great way to put this verse into practice. As I write the word "steady", I have to smile to myself and ask myself to define steady. I have had the most steady, full-time, part-time job ever by substitute teaching. Seriously! I have consistently averaged 3-4 subbing jobs per week - well not counting post-Christmas! A little 'skinny' there but you know what? It all worked out. For the times when it was a little 'skinny', I reminded myself that God knew my needs, and had exactly the right amount of jobs, on the right days for me. And He did.
Learning to appreciate a flexible job schedule. I have learned to love my schedule. Sometimes I work all day, sometimes half-days, and then sometimes have days off in the middle of the week or the end of the week...long weekends...oh! and I have shorter work days! Out of school at 3:30 or 1:30 on Fridays....plus the schedule has been a god-send for working on my masters degree. which brings me to my next point...
Learning when to let go and having the courage to do it. I am postponing the master's program for a while. The bachelor's program with University of Phoenix was a great experience; however, the master's program has been nothing but stressful with the learning teams from the get-go. During spring break, after a particularly frustating experience, I cried "uncle" and withdraw from the program - mainly because
I was not having the time to plan for my upcoming wedding, much less get excited about it. What a relief to let school go for a time and concentrate on what needs to be priority. With our school's budget cuts, I am not too hopeful that a job will be available any time soon, so why continue the "killer" push to get done? Aside from the fact that that is my personality!
Another thing I let go of was my condo. I have tried selling and renting with no luck selling and worse luck with some of my renters! Ugh! Anyway, after struggling to hang onto the barbie townhouse, I decided to cry "uncle" on that one too and handed it back to the bank. Although I felt a bit of shame not fulfilling my mortgage agreement, I also felt a tremendous sense of relief. A huge burden was lifted from my shoulders and the release of a stress I did not realize I was carrying.
Everyday I continue to feel myself decompressing. I have been on overload for a long time and did not realize the daily pressure I have put myself under. I think a layer lifts each day as my schedule is freer and responsibilities are lighter.
As I close this phase of Delighting Myself, I know I will continue to use the things I have learned and subconsciously, if not consciously, continue to delight myself in the Lord.
Once again, God has been so very good to me as I struggled to find my way. I am grateful for the time I have had for this venture and all of the lessons the Lord has had for me.
I challenge you to have your own "Delight Yourself In the Lord" project. Who knows what God has in store for you!
Coming next: The Chubby Bride Work out Plan!
Monday, January 25, 2010
She said, "Yes!"
So guess who is getting married???!!!! Yep, Princess Jaye has found her Prince!
Last year, as I was in my long-term sub position, I just so happened to be stationed right next door to the very cute and handsome 8th grade history teacher who just so happened to be single.
One day, I went into his room to ask a question and as I started to leave the room, he said, "Could I ask you a question?" Sure, I replied expecting him to ask me something about school. Uh no, that would be a negative! He said, "Would I be overstepping professional bounds if I asked you out sometime?" Sucking up my surprise, I smiled and said, "No, that would be great!" So we went to dinner, and dinner again, and then we were going out a lot... and then Christmas came along....
It just so happens Scott, (my prince charming does have a name), has Texas ties. His parents own a ranch in Dripping Spring, Texas (south of Austin). We went there for Christmas. Actually, he was at the ranch while I was flittin' from Dripping Springs to Austin to Lubbock to Dripping Springs.
So anyway, I had traveled to Lubbock with Keilah and Adam and Collier to have Christmas with my family. I flew back to Austin on Christmas afternoon. Scott picked me up at the airport and had yellow roses for me. I thought, "Well, how sweet of him!" We went back to the ranch for dinner since everything was closed on Christmas.
We had the fireplace going and it was all so warm and cozy. I sat in the rocking chair by the fireplace and Scott was sitting across the room from me. I was telling Scott my ideas about what he should do if he wanted to sell his house. As I was talking, he got out of his chair and came and got down on one knee by my chair and took my hand. He interrupted my chatter and said something like "I love your ideas but what I want is for you to share your life with me for the rest of our lives. Will you marry me?" And he dropped a ring into my hand. I wish someone had been there with a camera because my mouth fell open and my eyes were as big as saucers! I said, "Oh My Gosh!" and threw my arms around his neck. He said, "Is that a yes?" "Yes! Yes! Yes!"
Wow, 2009, as the high school principal put it was: Epic for me!I passed the Praxis II exam. Earned my Bachelor of Science degree. Became a grandmother to my precious Collier. Started working toward my Master's degree....and got engaged!!! Pretty Awesome year wouldn't you say?
My Scott, my prince is just amazing. I simply can't wait to see what all God has planned for us. Scott is the most wonderful, incredible gift from God and I am deliriously happy that he is in my life.
God, you are so incredibly good and creative. You took me to Colorado so I could find my Texas guy. What a hoot!
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Project: Delight Myself in the Lord - Day whatever : )
Wondering if I am still delighting? Yes, I am. I have been busy with Master's program - two classes and orientation down and about 22 classes to go; my "manfriend" (I think saying boyfriend is so..so..highschoolish), children's ministry (I am now children's minister at my church), and substitute teaching. Life is good.
Monday, we pretty much had a "mini" blizzard blow through. I was subbing and as I watched the constant, heavy snowfall, I worried I wouldn't be able to get my car out of the snow. Sure enough, although the snow wasn't too deep around my car as the snowplows had kept the road plowed, there was just enough incline that I could not get my car on the road. I had to have three 8th grade boys and the janitor give me a push. (that sort of reminds me of when I rode bumpers cars at Six flags or the amusement part - you know how the car stops in the middle of the floor and the attendant has to come and give you a push to go....yeah....) As I waited for them to come out and give me a push, I watched some high school kids in a little car struggle to drive up the street....five kids in this little economy car....three of them got out and pushed the car until it gained traction and could go....it was funny...I knew just how the driver felt.
I am not so good in the snow. The first two winters here I was with my friends Dan and Donna most of the time and went everywhere with them. They have the big Tahoe and big truck with 4-wheel drive plus we did everything together so I didn't get much practice driving in the snow. I missed the mother lode winter the year I was in Texas and then the next year was a rather weak winter so now... Welcome to reality Jaye. Thank goodness they plow my condo drive and clear the steps.
OK, for some winter-living attitude adjustments I have had since coming to live here:
1. High heeled dress boots look great in the store and catalog but are just plain stupid for here. I was determined to remain a "cupcake" and not to become a granola bar, leaving fashion for the city. I am still a "cupcake" but probably a less decorated one. There is nothing wrong with wearing practical, flat-heeled boots to travel to your destination and changing into more fashionable ones once you are inside.
2. When I first came here, I saw some women wearing these knee-high, fur-lined (the furr encircled the top of the boot, showing about an inch or so all the way around), lace-up boots. And I thought,"That is just over-kill on boots. That is just gaudy Colorado style." Well, uh, as soon as I can afford a pair of those boots, they will be residing in my closet. The first year I lived here, I found a pair of Ugg look alike boots at Target. Pink suede lined with lambs wool. I wear those quite often.
3. When I lived in Austin, I never wore a coat in winter. My motto was "I can stand anything for a few minutes." I never was prepared. I am still working on this one. I own two heavy coats and several jackets, two pairs of gloves and am working on a scarf collection. Now if I can just remember where I put the gloves and where I left my coat, I will be doing great. I am also becoming a fan of peacoats, coatdresses, and anything fashionable relating to "coats."
4. Has anyone watched "New in Town"? It is a movie about a city girl moving to Minnesota...yeah....and in one scene she gets stuck in the snow in the middle of nowhere with nothing but the clothes she is taking on a trip back to....Florida...and a bottle of wine. She runs her red, sexy nightie up her antennae for a distress flag and gets totally wasted on a bottle of wine as she sits in her car waiting for help. Well, I try to keep a blanket in the car and sensible shoes should I happen to be wearing stupid shoes on a day I should have worn better shoes. I do not have a bottle of wine but water is a good thing. Except I drank all of it on my way home at Thanksgiving. Neither do I have a sexy, red nightie to tie onto my antennae to use as a distress signal. Reckon my City Market shopping bags would work?
5. The lower-necked shirts currently in vogue are better served with a liner shirt underneath or given away to friends in Austin, or saved for a trip back to Austin.
6. Keep the gas tank filled. I went to a friends house to housesit without realizing my tank was so low. They live out on a ranch in Chromo - Chromo has one store on the side of the road and that is it. It is a convenience store/post office. I knew there was a gas pump there; however, I didn't know the gas pump was out of service. (where is the convenience in that one?) I was sweating just a bit as to whether I would make it back to town. Once at the ranch, I looked around for gas cans as I knew Jim had four wheelers and a tractor. I found a gas can and put enough gas in to hopefully make it back to town. (I did.) Or how about the time I didn't fill up the tank in Dan's truck I took to Albuquerque? I did not realize his gas tank gauge did not work and ended up driving on fumes across the deserted Apache reservation...ummmm...no cell service, out on the reservation...wearing stupid heels that had rubbed a blister on my feet....couldn't have walked four steps in those shoes....not a good thing....I am learning to take this preparedness thing seriously.
5. I have learned to build a fire in my fireplace and actually get it to burn nicely. I have also learned where you get kindling. The city girl in me arose when I innocently asked Scott, "Where do you get kindling?" He smiled and said, "You hand your son an ax and have him split wood." Oh.
6. I have learned shopping at Cabella's, The Bass Pro Shop, and REI is not a bad thing. Even if my daughter and youngest sister would raise their eyebrows.
7. Snowpants and waterproof pants with zip-off legs to create shorts are nice items to have living in your closet. Owning a pair of wader-boot things are handy as well. Keeps the legs of your pants dry when you are out snow-shoeing, cross-country skiing, etc.
8. One thing I haven't changed is the....hair thing. I do not wear beanies or hats on my hair. Hair squished around my face is just ...not cute or pretty. And makeup - makeup is a beautiful thing and is as necessary as brushing your teeth.
9. My car has "On-Star" capabilities. I am re-thinking my decision about not activitating it....what do you think?
So cupcake girl in the granola world is adapting to her environment; however, I will always be the "prissy" in the "practical" world.
If you read all of this - thanks for sticking around as I reflected on my life adjustments in Colorado.
Monday, we pretty much had a "mini" blizzard blow through. I was subbing and as I watched the constant, heavy snowfall, I worried I wouldn't be able to get my car out of the snow. Sure enough, although the snow wasn't too deep around my car as the snowplows had kept the road plowed, there was just enough incline that I could not get my car on the road. I had to have three 8th grade boys and the janitor give me a push. (that sort of reminds me of when I rode bumpers cars at Six flags or the amusement part - you know how the car stops in the middle of the floor and the attendant has to come and give you a push to go....yeah....) As I waited for them to come out and give me a push, I watched some high school kids in a little car struggle to drive up the street....five kids in this little economy car....three of them got out and pushed the car until it gained traction and could go....it was funny...I knew just how the driver felt.
I am not so good in the snow. The first two winters here I was with my friends Dan and Donna most of the time and went everywhere with them. They have the big Tahoe and big truck with 4-wheel drive plus we did everything together so I didn't get much practice driving in the snow. I missed the mother lode winter the year I was in Texas and then the next year was a rather weak winter so now... Welcome to reality Jaye. Thank goodness they plow my condo drive and clear the steps.
OK, for some winter-living attitude adjustments I have had since coming to live here:
1. High heeled dress boots look great in the store and catalog but are just plain stupid for here. I was determined to remain a "cupcake" and not to become a granola bar, leaving fashion for the city. I am still a "cupcake" but probably a less decorated one. There is nothing wrong with wearing practical, flat-heeled boots to travel to your destination and changing into more fashionable ones once you are inside.
2. When I first came here, I saw some women wearing these knee-high, fur-lined (the furr encircled the top of the boot, showing about an inch or so all the way around), lace-up boots. And I thought,"That is just over-kill on boots. That is just gaudy Colorado style." Well, uh, as soon as I can afford a pair of those boots, they will be residing in my closet. The first year I lived here, I found a pair of Ugg look alike boots at Target. Pink suede lined with lambs wool. I wear those quite often.
3. When I lived in Austin, I never wore a coat in winter. My motto was "I can stand anything for a few minutes." I never was prepared. I am still working on this one. I own two heavy coats and several jackets, two pairs of gloves and am working on a scarf collection. Now if I can just remember where I put the gloves and where I left my coat, I will be doing great. I am also becoming a fan of peacoats, coatdresses, and anything fashionable relating to "coats."
4. Has anyone watched "New in Town"? It is a movie about a city girl moving to Minnesota...yeah....and in one scene she gets stuck in the snow in the middle of nowhere with nothing but the clothes she is taking on a trip back to....Florida...and a bottle of wine. She runs her red, sexy nightie up her antennae for a distress flag and gets totally wasted on a bottle of wine as she sits in her car waiting for help. Well, I try to keep a blanket in the car and sensible shoes should I happen to be wearing stupid shoes on a day I should have worn better shoes. I do not have a bottle of wine but water is a good thing. Except I drank all of it on my way home at Thanksgiving. Neither do I have a sexy, red nightie to tie onto my antennae to use as a distress signal. Reckon my City Market shopping bags would work?
5. The lower-necked shirts currently in vogue are better served with a liner shirt underneath or given away to friends in Austin, or saved for a trip back to Austin.
6. Keep the gas tank filled. I went to a friends house to housesit without realizing my tank was so low. They live out on a ranch in Chromo - Chromo has one store on the side of the road and that is it. It is a convenience store/post office. I knew there was a gas pump there; however, I didn't know the gas pump was out of service. (where is the convenience in that one?) I was sweating just a bit as to whether I would make it back to town. Once at the ranch, I looked around for gas cans as I knew Jim had four wheelers and a tractor. I found a gas can and put enough gas in to hopefully make it back to town. (I did.) Or how about the time I didn't fill up the tank in Dan's truck I took to Albuquerque? I did not realize his gas tank gauge did not work and ended up driving on fumes across the deserted Apache reservation...ummmm...no cell service, out on the reservation...wearing stupid heels that had rubbed a blister on my feet....couldn't have walked four steps in those shoes....not a good thing....I am learning to take this preparedness thing seriously.
5. I have learned to build a fire in my fireplace and actually get it to burn nicely. I have also learned where you get kindling. The city girl in me arose when I innocently asked Scott, "Where do you get kindling?" He smiled and said, "You hand your son an ax and have him split wood." Oh.
6. I have learned shopping at Cabella's, The Bass Pro Shop, and REI is not a bad thing. Even if my daughter and youngest sister would raise their eyebrows.
7. Snowpants and waterproof pants with zip-off legs to create shorts are nice items to have living in your closet. Owning a pair of wader-boot things are handy as well. Keeps the legs of your pants dry when you are out snow-shoeing, cross-country skiing, etc.
8. One thing I haven't changed is the....hair thing. I do not wear beanies or hats on my hair. Hair squished around my face is just ...not cute or pretty. And makeup - makeup is a beautiful thing and is as necessary as brushing your teeth.
9. My car has "On-Star" capabilities. I am re-thinking my decision about not activitating it....what do you think?
So cupcake girl in the granola world is adapting to her environment; however, I will always be the "prissy" in the "practical" world.
If you read all of this - thanks for sticking around as I reflected on my life adjustments in Colorado.
Friday, November 6, 2009
Project: Delight Yourself in the Lord: Living Joyously in the Land of Unemployment
In my last post I ended with "I find that I am living in a place most people rarely get to inhabit. No - they get to inhabit - but don't enjoy it. Not Pagosa - the life of unemployment. I am sure many would say, "We'll let you take this one for the team, Jaye." ..... Let's talk about that...
Unemployment has been the absolute best thing in the world for me. Really. I am serious. I may say that I trust God but when the things that are most important to me and the things I rely upon are taken away from me - that is when the real truth comes out. Do I (we) really believe God is sufficient for EVERYTHING? Do I (we) really believe that He is going to come through for me (us)? Is He really going to provide for my (our) every need without my help...my job skills...my bank account? Let me tell you - when hard times come, this is when the rubber meets the road in my (our) faith walk, don't you think?
Unemployment and Project Delight is making me a much more disciplined person in a variety of ways. For instance, this morning, I made myself a budget. I know. I don't hardly have any money and most of what I do have is "faith-based." I laugh as a write that because I substitute teach...you know ...the whole "separation of church and state" thing....yeah right. Anyway, projecting in faith of what I think I will have, I made a budget. I even thought I would challenge myself further and budgeted a tithe. And wrote out the check which I will put in the offering plate on Sunday. Should have been doing it all along but I got....skeered... about trusting my Dad.
But here's the deal. I don't know what God has in store for my income. So far, the substitute teaching is averaging out very well. Listen to this: Last week, on Sunday night, I had one job on the calendar for the week. (I just live by the week.) Okay, so I was going to have an easy week. No worries. Gave me more time to work on Harvest Fest.
8:10 Wednesday, just settled in with coffee and bible and my phone rings. Ms. Gorman, freshman algebra teacher. She has a migraine and needs a sub. Could I come in. Sure!
Friday morning, 6:50 a.m. phone rings. I knew it was a sub call but I really needed to write a paper. Ignored phone. Felt guilty. Called back and took the job. You know if you don't take the jobs offered they might not call you back! There was my 3 day a week average! The words from Psalms 37..."Wait patiently. Trust in the Lord." ring so true. And I don't worry about what is or is not on the calendar! Nor do I worry about what happens after May 31st. Someday, I will have a job and it will be perfect and in God's perfect time.
I believe with all my heart, my Father, Daddy, has me in His blessed hands. Every need and sometimes my wants are met. I am not suffering in the least. My faith trust base is being strengthened - one more time. I know my family wonders sometimes why things are hard for me and why doesn't God let me catch a break and live easy but I am glad that He hasn't. I would miss so much of Him if that happened. I hope during this time I am becoming wiser. I know that I am the happiest I have ever been. I laugh all the time and I rarely get bent out of shape over things and if I do - it is short-lived. Why waste precious energy on .... stupid?
I don't know where this trail leads and I am content to walk along each day just taking in today. So, you guys out there, I will gladly take one for the team in unemployment. It's the best thing that's happened to me and honestly....I am sorry you missed it!
Ms. Jaye
Unemployment has been the absolute best thing in the world for me. Really. I am serious. I may say that I trust God but when the things that are most important to me and the things I rely upon are taken away from me - that is when the real truth comes out. Do I (we) really believe God is sufficient for EVERYTHING? Do I (we) really believe that He is going to come through for me (us)? Is He really going to provide for my (our) every need without my help...my job skills...my bank account? Let me tell you - when hard times come, this is when the rubber meets the road in my (our) faith walk, don't you think?
Unemployment and Project Delight is making me a much more disciplined person in a variety of ways. For instance, this morning, I made myself a budget. I know. I don't hardly have any money and most of what I do have is "faith-based." I laugh as a write that because I substitute teach...you know ...the whole "separation of church and state" thing....yeah right. Anyway, projecting in faith of what I think I will have, I made a budget. I even thought I would challenge myself further and budgeted a tithe. And wrote out the check which I will put in the offering plate on Sunday. Should have been doing it all along but I got....skeered... about trusting my Dad.
But here's the deal. I don't know what God has in store for my income. So far, the substitute teaching is averaging out very well. Listen to this: Last week, on Sunday night, I had one job on the calendar for the week. (I just live by the week.) Okay, so I was going to have an easy week. No worries. Gave me more time to work on Harvest Fest.
8:10 Wednesday, just settled in with coffee and bible and my phone rings. Ms. Gorman, freshman algebra teacher. She has a migraine and needs a sub. Could I come in. Sure!
Friday morning, 6:50 a.m. phone rings. I knew it was a sub call but I really needed to write a paper. Ignored phone. Felt guilty. Called back and took the job. You know if you don't take the jobs offered they might not call you back! There was my 3 day a week average! The words from Psalms 37..."Wait patiently. Trust in the Lord." ring so true. And I don't worry about what is or is not on the calendar! Nor do I worry about what happens after May 31st. Someday, I will have a job and it will be perfect and in God's perfect time.
I believe with all my heart, my Father, Daddy, has me in His blessed hands. Every need and sometimes my wants are met. I am not suffering in the least. My faith trust base is being strengthened - one more time. I know my family wonders sometimes why things are hard for me and why doesn't God let me catch a break and live easy but I am glad that He hasn't. I would miss so much of Him if that happened. I hope during this time I am becoming wiser. I know that I am the happiest I have ever been. I laugh all the time and I rarely get bent out of shape over things and if I do - it is short-lived. Why waste precious energy on .... stupid?
I don't know where this trail leads and I am content to walk along each day just taking in today. So, you guys out there, I will gladly take one for the team in unemployment. It's the best thing that's happened to me and honestly....I am sorry you missed it!
Ms. Jaye
Friday, October 23, 2009
Project: Delight Yourself in the Lord
Okay - just because you haven't heard from me doesn't mean I'm not still delighting! Life has picked up pace. Started school - UoP - and am off and running on the master's. It will be fun because I really like the subject matter!
Had to do jury duty two days this week and that really messed me up on my paper writing schedule so I was up very late last night beating a 12 midnight deadline. However, we won't mention the fact that I procrastinated the last two weeks to get it done will we?
I am still reading,"The Sacred Sorrow" but can't read any further until I finish the book of Job. I have challenged myself to read Job all the way through as I never have and Michael Card challenges us to do so at the close of the section on Job. I read 5 chapters a day and have 7 more to go.
(you can tell I don't read everyday)
Also have started reading "Prayer" by Philip Yancey - love his writing. It is so honest and real and takes you out of the church box. I have also read his books called "What's So Amazing About Grace?" "The Jesus I Never Knew" and "Disappointment with God."
AND I am reading "Tomboy Bride" a book, actually, a real journal of a woman who traveled to Colorado to be with her husband during the Gold Strikes and her life living in a mining camp.
And trying to stay up with my reading for my school...and sometimes work.
This delighting myself in the Lord has made me be more disciplined. Don't laugh as you are not seeing the discipline in the blog writing. Inconsquential, actually. I find myself focused on being delighted. Not sad and worrying about stuff. The project has affected my attitude and thinking. It has changed the way I view my time with God.
The other morning, I woke up before the alarm went off. I lay there trying to go back to sleep and I felt this huge desire to get up and visit with God. Not pray. visit. What is the difference? For me, it was quite different. I didn't want to go before God with my usual prayer routine. I just wanted to talk to him....like a friend. No formal wording or the way I usually pray. (Do you think God ever wants to say to us, "Just shut up and talk to me?") So I got up and sat on my bed and had this sensation that God was sitting right there with me, crosslegged, right in front of me and we talked. I told him how things were going and how happy I am and just stuff. And we laughed. That was because in the course of conversation, I said I wanted to be like Paul having a tentmaker's kind of job and then I thought of Paul's life and all he went through and I stopped talking and that's when God and I laughed. Because the LAST time I told God I wanted to be like somebody - as in Darlene Rose - this missionary prisoner of war in the 1940's - my life got turned upside down. SO, I remembered that and so did God ...and we laughed and I said to God. "Let's put some qualifiers around that one." The whole 'meet with God' experience was SO amazing.
I don't really know why the beach scene is a place God takes me to but He does. As we talked, and it was SO comfortable, my mind ventured off to walking on the beach. And it was God walking with me, holding my hand and hugging me close as we walked along the seashore. I didn't ask him for anything - other than being like Paul - uh - having a tentmaker job like Paul - we just talked and It was good!
I find that I am living in a place most people rarely get to inhabit. No - they get to inhabit - but don't enjoy it. Not Pagosa - the life of unemployment. I am sure many would say, "We'll let you take this one for the team, Jaye." .....
I will continue this line of thought later - I must go walk as I have missed my routine all week. Walking also is great think time for writing. My head is overflowing. So
with that
Good morning! I'm off!
Had to do jury duty two days this week and that really messed me up on my paper writing schedule so I was up very late last night beating a 12 midnight deadline. However, we won't mention the fact that I procrastinated the last two weeks to get it done will we?
I am still reading,"The Sacred Sorrow" but can't read any further until I finish the book of Job. I have challenged myself to read Job all the way through as I never have and Michael Card challenges us to do so at the close of the section on Job. I read 5 chapters a day and have 7 more to go.
(you can tell I don't read everyday)
Also have started reading "Prayer" by Philip Yancey - love his writing. It is so honest and real and takes you out of the church box. I have also read his books called "What's So Amazing About Grace?" "The Jesus I Never Knew" and "Disappointment with God."
AND I am reading "Tomboy Bride" a book, actually, a real journal of a woman who traveled to Colorado to be with her husband during the Gold Strikes and her life living in a mining camp.
And trying to stay up with my reading for my school...and sometimes work.
This delighting myself in the Lord has made me be more disciplined. Don't laugh as you are not seeing the discipline in the blog writing. Inconsquential, actually. I find myself focused on being delighted. Not sad and worrying about stuff. The project has affected my attitude and thinking. It has changed the way I view my time with God.
The other morning, I woke up before the alarm went off. I lay there trying to go back to sleep and I felt this huge desire to get up and visit with God. Not pray. visit. What is the difference? For me, it was quite different. I didn't want to go before God with my usual prayer routine. I just wanted to talk to him....like a friend. No formal wording or the way I usually pray. (Do you think God ever wants to say to us, "Just shut up and talk to me?") So I got up and sat on my bed and had this sensation that God was sitting right there with me, crosslegged, right in front of me and we talked. I told him how things were going and how happy I am and just stuff. And we laughed. That was because in the course of conversation, I said I wanted to be like Paul having a tentmaker's kind of job and then I thought of Paul's life and all he went through and I stopped talking and that's when God and I laughed. Because the LAST time I told God I wanted to be like somebody - as in Darlene Rose - this missionary prisoner of war in the 1940's - my life got turned upside down. SO, I remembered that and so did God ...and we laughed and I said to God. "Let's put some qualifiers around that one." The whole 'meet with God' experience was SO amazing.
I don't really know why the beach scene is a place God takes me to but He does. As we talked, and it was SO comfortable, my mind ventured off to walking on the beach. And it was God walking with me, holding my hand and hugging me close as we walked along the seashore. I didn't ask him for anything - other than being like Paul - uh - having a tentmaker job like Paul - we just talked and It was good!
I find that I am living in a place most people rarely get to inhabit. No - they get to inhabit - but don't enjoy it. Not Pagosa - the life of unemployment. I am sure many would say, "We'll let you take this one for the team, Jaye." .....
I will continue this line of thought later - I must go walk as I have missed my routine all week. Walking also is great think time for writing. My head is overflowing. So
with that
Good morning! I'm off!
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